Abhinav Bhatt

My TV wants to take a Vacation

Don’t you sometimes inflict pain on to yourself just to see how much would it hurt or do you still have it in you? Like touching a hot pan to see what temperature can you handle, or trying to lift 10 KG bag of Aata to see if your backbone is still in solid-state or watch News on TV just to see how many decibels your ears can tolerate? I could dip my hand in boiling milk and I could lift heavy bags but I usually give up after checking the sheer loudness of the TV News for more than 5 minutes. And I live almost next to an airport so I know what loudness is.

I wonder how these news people sleep at night? Maybe everything they do is in ALL CAPS. GOOD MORNING? MORNING I SAID. DON’T YOU THINK THE MORNING IS GOOD? HOW DARE YOU SAY GOOD MORNING AFTER 12? What if they get a little extra salt in their food? What if someone overtakes them from the wrong side? How do they react with their Kids when they show them their report cards? Even the graphics on these news channels are so glaring that if you feel cold any day, keep a TV with News On instead of spending money to make a fireplace.

I have tried a lot but News is becoming more and more unbearable. I am not saying that it is not relevant. I am just saying that I have now become nihilistic enough to ignore it and still live normally. I have even tried the silent news channels. They are so depressing and dull about everything around that one feels that it would need some electric shocks to come back to reality which is normally just fine if not 100%.

The day is not too far when the TV would come with coolants and radiators. And if they get too hot due to the sheer loudness, you might have to take them not to a TV Repair shop but with you to some hill station so that they can take a vacation.

So I recently watched: Pushpavalli

Pushpavalli means a Creeper. The one which can grow and reach places you might not want it to go to. But soon it would make its presence felt and can sweep you off your feet by the extent it has grown. The show created by Comedian Sumukhi Suresh suits its name. It was first available on Prime Video in December 2017 and the second season came in March 2020. There could be more seasons in the future. I am generally reluctant to give my opinions before the show concludes but sometimes I cannot stop myself.

Listen to the Nerds!

The TV show which I was most reluctant to watch had always been ‘Friends’. I was unnecessarily living under a rock for many years and thought that since everyone is watching it, I must rather stay away. Unnecessary egoistic struggle. I eventually caved in and watched it a few years ago because the pop-culture references to it never stopped going away. I have started rewatching it now with my wife as the need for humor has never been higher in recent times and I believe that ‘Friends’ is something you can always trust to bring a chuckle to you.

The Königsberg Problem

Each Graph Theory class would mention the Königsberg problem once. The problem is simple but the solution isn’t. Basically, there was a city in Prussia (old Germany) called Königsberg (now known as Kaliningrad and it is now in Russia) with 7 bridges over a river. The problem statement was to find a path that could cross each bridge just once in such a way that one could return back to the point where one started.

https://www.britannica.com/science/Konigsberg-bridge-problem

Inspiration

““You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take” –
— Wayne Gretzky”
— Michael Scott

““Inspiration exists, but it has to find you working.”
— Pablo Picasso”
— Me

Bye Google, Bye Alexa!

I know we live in a world that is trying to be more and more Gender Neutral. And, I have no qualm in saying that it should be. Many writers and people whose words matter have started to use ‘She’ instead of ‘He’ in their common parlance. In fact, if you have actually understood the meaning of the word Feminism (and not just from a high-level but the actual intention), you would know that there is a need for this -ism because the world is titled in an obvious direction (The World is not straight! Self-pat on the pun. Tilted as in ~23.5°. Bad one!). However, many people get confused and often up-in-arms about why it is called Feminism and not Human-ism or Egalitarianism or whatever your nearest Synonyms Thesaurus can suggest.

I guess some confusion is understandable. Everyone can be confused. Like my Google Mini and FireStick’s Alexa, although they claim to be the smartest and all, are confused themselves as to where they should be. They speak in a feminine voice but when I ask whether they are female, they decline and try to stay neutral. (I know how to change default voice.) Obviously, we have very primitive AI tools at our disposal at the moment. Even if they appear to be amazing, they are closer to being Bluetooth powered Voice-Enabled tools than being actual AI/ML breakthrough.

The Only Problem with Rajma Chawal…

The Only Problem with Rajma Chawal is that we cannot have it every day. We cannot have the best every day. Life is like that. Sometimes, all we can get our hands on is the dreaded Lauki (Bottle Gourd), but we still need to carry on.

Mark Twain said,

“Eat a live frog first thing in the morning and nothing worse will happen to you the rest of the day.”

It is another thing that David Blaine took it literally without any pain but Twain is actually making sense here. Maybe when you start a week, all charged up and ready to rumble and then Monday hits you and throws you off the tracks. Then the first thought which comes in mind is that if the start of the week is bad, the week is going to get worse. But days don’t have a memory of their own. Remember, you had New Year Resolutions for 2020 too! We have to move on.

You might have had your day, week, or even your year at one particular time but then there will be another day that is not yours. But carry on as another day is right around the corner. There will be another Rajma Chawal Day soon.

P.S.: When is the Government bringing a bill to make Rajma Chawal India’s National Dish? It will pass with my voice vote for sure. *burp*

Header Photos:

Rice: Photo by Pierre Bamin on Unsplash
Beans: Photo by Volodymyr Hryshchenko on Unsplash

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