Author Archives: Abhinav Bhatt

So I recently read: Atomic Habits by James Clear

I want to talk about some people I am jealous of. And that’s because I know they are faking it but still doing it successfully. I am talking about self-proclaimed Life Coaches, Mentors, Public Speakers, and likes.

Many of us, at some point in life, read self-help books. The intention is clear, we think that by reading and following the advice in the book, we might make our life better. It is a huge genre in itself and they often turns out to be the best-selling books months after months. But seriously, how many lives of people you know including your own have actually got changed by reading books? Passively Reading is not really acting but just entertainment, isn’t it?

So, why am I jealous of blokes who call themselves Life Coaches? One because it is evident that they are really good at public speaking which I am envious of. Now, I can speak to a good crowd size without breaking a sweat too but I am yet to attain the tag of someone who is considered to be a “Public Speaker – Public Speaker”. Still some way to go! Second, I understand that people are really creatures of habits and your life cannot really change just by attending a free seminar or reading an amazing self-help book. The onus of improving one’s life lies with oneself. Deep down, you know what is wrong in your life and you know how to solve it but inertia, sigh! Of course, if you don’t really know, sure, take some advice and try to mould it to fit your own life. The people who have become these Life Coaches and all, understand our problems as well. They are just people who dress well, speak good words, tell you to follow these 5 pieces of advice and you will become great. Not really. There is no 5 pointer plan to be successful. They act like they know it all and maybe milk your money in the process. I don’t think that is unethical but actually not really worth it. If you find someone who is really worth being a role model, you will automatically try to follow their lifestyle and try to be like them. If that lifestyle is too difficult to follow, then you will just give up and end up just as a fan.

However, my opinion changed a bit after reading Atomic Habits. I have read 2 books about habits. This one and another is The Power of Habit by Charles Duhigg. While The Power of Habit goes a bit scientific, still being really good, about how habits are formed and how habits form individuals by going deep into the science, Atomic Habit uses all that and tells us about how to actually create habits and put it to use.

One of the most important lessons from the book is this, which trumps everything a life coach will say and also life coaches will use the same thing to make you believe them:

The ultimate form of intrinsic motivation is when a habit becomes part of your identity. It’s one thing to say I’m the type of person who wants this. It’s something very different to say I’m the type of person who is this. The more pride you have in a particular aspect of your identity, the more motivated you will be to maintain the habits associated with it.

The goal is not to read a book, the goal is to become a reader. The goal is not to run a marathon, the goal is to become a runner. The goal is not to learn an instrument, the goal is to become a musician.

Simple two-step process: Decide the type of person you want to be. Prove it to yourself with small wins.

James Clear

The above is used very effectively by the life coaches who are new. They know they are new to the game but they have believed that that’s what they are (self-proclaimed-experts) so they will do everything possible to act as a Life Coach which is actually clever. (It is also easier than being a musician because you will actually have to learn music or being a runner because you actually have to start running.) But being a life coach, you will just have to speak convincingly.

Not making this post about them, the lesson I learnt is this: If you want to change a habit or develop one, act like the person who has good habits. If you transform your identity to become like your role model, the job’s done.

I found Atomic Habits, one of the most well thought of self-help books I have read yet. It gives charts, shout outs, call outs, and makes the habit-formation simpler. I recommend this to anyone who already understands their problems and willing to fix them. It is still up to you how much you want to change your life.

The book summarizes itself pretty well with this:

Whenever you’re looking to improve, you can rotate through the Four Laws of Behavior Change until you find the next bottleneck. Make it obvious. Make it attractive. Make it easy. Make it satisfying. Round and round.

You may buy this book from here: https://amzn.to/2UEPL7y

If you want to get James Clear super insightful newsletter, click here.

Featured Photo by Ross Findon on Unsplash

Newsletters I Follow AND YOU CAN TOO

In times when our attention span is getting shorter and shorter, I fool myself by indulging in reading Newsletters once in a while which provides insight, knowledge, entertainment, and a belief that not all is going down the drain even if it appears so.

I don’t listen to podcasts much because I am not traveling on a bus (I am aatmnirbhar) or working out (are you???) and after really trying to listen to a bunch of them, the only podcasts I could tolerate were interviews types like Tim Ferris’s. I think I am more of a video essay person (like Kurzgesagt or Nerdwriter or Vox, etc.) and I like to read more than listen.

So like a literate person would do (i.e. share good knowledge), here’s a list of Newsletters I find interesting. This is like a blog roll but to make it more convenient, it comes to your inbox instead of you going anywhere else. You can also subscribe if you want as they are free.

  • Seth Godin – Blogging Daily since when the Internet started I think. Just read to know.
  • A Learning a Day (Rohan Rajiv) – Another daily one! Short and sometimes not so short tidbits about positive uplifting things which one wouldn’t mind at all
  • James Clear – 3 – 2 – 1 – From the author of Atomic Habits, 3 ideas, 2 quotes, 1 question. Easy peasy to make a habit!
  • Mind F*ck Monday – From the author of The Subtle Art of not giving a F*ck, newsletter which reads more like someone’s talking to you!
  • Visual Wisdom (Deepu Asok) – Ideas that are simple, yet effective, presented either visually or through Tweets.
  • Ryan Holiday – Again, life advice as if freshly brewed coffee on a calm and cozy afternoon.
  • Shu Omi – Good content collated over the Internet presented to you to make your day better.
  • New Space India – Some insights on what’s happening in Space’s Space in India.
  • The India Uncut – More popular as a podcast and just recently started (again) as a blog, this is new.

Some defunct Newsletters but they are still a good read:

Ok, I don’t really hate podcasts at all (I might have come off harsh on them above. <3 only). Here are some of some people I know. And once I regularly follow them, maybe podcasts would become my thing too. Check them out and if they row your boat, jump on to the bandwagon (which should be a boat):

  • Haal Chaal Theek Thaak Hai – Nuanced + Fun discussion about Indian Pop culture. Not Millenial Pop Culture but the actual culture which matters.
  • Talk Your Way Up – Podcast about speaking better and talking your way up. The name also suggests the same! It is going really good,
  • On the go Gyaan – Very new podcast by Toastmasters folks (like the above one) so all the best to them!

Featured Photo by Jamie Street on Unsplash

P.S.: You can subscribe to my blog too, only takes a kidney at a time to read.

Imposter Syndrome

More often than not, one feels that there is so much to learn, there is no time. Or, there is so much information to grasp, but one doesn’t have the capacity. Or, there is so much to eat, but the stomach can only stretch this much.

Alright, the last time might be the most real of all the 3 but many times I too feel the weight of being an imposter. Imposter Syndrome just means that you feel that whatever you have achieved was just due to sheer luck. You don’t really possess the knowledge or skills but you were just right there at the right moment.

We might actually be unaware of certain things, and that is totally fine, but it is very easy to trick your brain and lie to it. Like not exercising and thinking that one can always remain healthy.

I, for instance, have knowledge about a lot of useless facts like Pluto and Charon have wobbly orbits with respect to each other. But the fact that certain accolades or praise I receive, I end up feeling I really didn’t deserve them and what if there is a tougher test coming up and I will fail miserably.

This image, however, gives a bit of comfort indeed.

Finding Time

I generally take pride in the fact that I can do many things at a time. I don’t claim to be a multi-tasker, because I don’t think that is possible to focus on multiple things together. I just mean that I could balance work, enjoy things in life, delve wholeheartedly into hobbies, and keep up health without much hassle.

All that belief has got shaken up in 2020 due to obvious reasons. Not only I find it considerably difficult to find time to finish given work, but I have also gone so far from my hobbies that I might resort to writing ‘Watching movies and playing Cricket’ in my resume which would be an utter lie.

When people say that they don’t have time, we often mock them that they aren’t really sincere so they are finding excuses. But the fact of the matter is that we also need to understand their state of mind. Everyone has the same 24 hours but how taxing are the 9-10 work hours, how many other responsibilities have got subsided due to workload so they are always busy catching up, and how much the will is left in the person to pursue anything else, is a thing to consider. (And how lazy they are if they really are procrastinating all the time.)

All it boils down to priorities. If someone really prioritizes family time over their work or hobbies, it is their choice and it will have its own implication and vice versa. Right now everyone has been affected in some way or the other but results originating from this time will have their impacts in the future.

At the moment, I tell myself that I really don’t have time. I mean I don’t have time to write blogs and writing gives me clarity. I seriously need to work on it. I think if we start by admitting that we need to make an effort, we are on the right track. Acting on it is next.

Featured Photo by Kunj Parekh on Unsplash

10 Years A Bangalorean

I know that real Bangaloreans won’t still call me a Bangalorean but today I completed a decade in Bangalore or Bengaluru or Namma, you get the drift. In 2010, I had thought that maybe I will move back home or probably NCR in the next 5 years. But here we are, still…

I remember the day clearly. Approaching Bangalore around 6 AM with a temperature of around 20 or 22 degree Celsius, the gray clouds almost hugging the greenery and a mixed sigh of relief donning my face as I said a bittersweet goodbye to a hot and sweltering Hyderabad (which is a fine city by the way), I finally reached ‘Majestic’. I was at Hyderabad from the last 3 months undergoing bloody entree level IT job training. I, along with my colleagues who had ‘chosen’ Bangalore as their preferred work location reached. I was received by a cousin who then took me in with him at his apartment which had views like these.

Iggalur
Iggalur

Neither my colleagues, nor my cousin live in Bangalore anymore.

I had arrived in Bangalore as a Software Engineer and became the part of the IT crowd.

I spent my first 6 years in BTM, the then North Indian part of the city. (Now we are everywhere). Needless to say, it was a great time there. At a time, there were almost 10 of my college-mates living in BTM. Those times, colleagues and friends were sorts of synonyms too. We earned less but enjoyed more, as they say. During those 6 years, I would have traveled to every nook and corner of the city in the quintessential BMTC and Autos. Then I am living near the CBD now and find it easy to go anywhere without any hassle. I have been here when one had to wait for a lonely Bus at Chandapura and I have been here when Uber had launched.

I have worked in the Electronic City as well the Outer Ring Road / Whitefield area. I have crossed Silk Board more number of times than the times people have called it the most conjusted area traffic wise.

It took me 8 years but I officially learned Kannada in 2018. That didn’t make much of a difference but I felt obligated to. I am yet to watch a proper Kannada movie, except a few seen in the TN buses which go from Silk Board to Hosur.

I have been a part of a movie shot in Bangalore. I have seen a Cricket Match at Chinnaswamy. I have been to Lalbagh and have taken people to Lalbagh and then Chikpet as a tourist guide. I have got stuck in rains for hours here and have driven in 2 feet deep sludge on the track which used to be a road. I have bought a Royal Enfield Electra in Bangalore and I have spent a lot of money on Idlis at breakfast, daily.

I have eaten Dosa at Vidhyarthi Bhavan or CTR just once but it is okay. I have been to Nandi Hills an uncountable number of times and switched from ‘What is this? There’s nothing here’ to ‘Let’s go to Nandi Hills! It has been ages!’.

A lot has changed as well. Many shops, restaurants, eateries opened up and got shut down. I have met so many folks who were colleagues, became friends, stayed together, left the city, went on to do great things, went on to have families, went on to different countries, took risks, succeeded, failed, lived, passed away, and so on. Some left an imprint, some left without any trace.

I became an independent person in Bangalore. I got married when I was in Bangalore. The last 2 sentences are not intended. I have had quarrels here. I have had romance.

I have enjoyed real late nights in Bangalore. I have stayed indoors for months in Bangalore.

After spending 10 years here, it has grown on me. Although now, I don’t brag about the weather or show frustration about the traffic. It is here and we know it so what’s there to say! 10 years have literally swooshed past because I still remember my first day pretty clearly.

I am here for some more. Bring it on.

Some of my older writings involving Bangalore

Bengalooroo Bytes

Q: What advice would you give to a new grad software engineer who’s moving to Bangalore from elsewhere (in India) in terms of where to live and where not to, places to hang out and not to hang out, and ways to save money?

A: https://qr.ae/pNKr2K

Bookstores of Bangalore
Auto!!
Hardly Surprising: Thoughts on Bengaluru's Apparent Night of Horror
Today was the day I should write about in a blogpost
Zombingaloroo-uuu-u
One Year in Bangalore

Featured Photo by https://unsplash.com/@nichu_avva

Optimistically Pessimist

That’s the right approach to live life in these times IMHO.

Lockdown is going to get over guys! Congratulations. It was tough, right? We had to stay indoors. We could only go outside to buy veggies and milk. We had to talk to people from School/relatives with whom we had stopped the conversations, and rightly so, a decade ago. We all came online on Zoom and took screenshots. People became cooks and fought over Youtube and Tiktok. It was something!

Didn’t we all hear all the claims about how the life is going to be in this ongoing + not really ending anytime soon + post COVID-19 world? We were told that it will never be the same again. There will be only work from homes. Schools will be just on the laptop. Masks would be the things and it will become haute couture level fashionable to have extreme and funky masks. Social Distancing would be a norm for a long long time and you will never have to tolerate those folks who hug all the time! Of course cinema halls would be a thing of the past and most restaurants would be only take-away ones.

But… I don’t get it!

Was this all a scam? Like seriously was this all a conspiracy? Like last 2 months were just some chapters out of a fictional story and now we are back to business? Even news channels are now back to usual terrorism in Kashmir news and usual debates about how my orange is more saffron than yours or how bollywood-walas are shouting Black Lives Matter but not shouting say why is the road outside my apartment dug up when monsoon is just starting and when are they going to fix it again?

From June 8th, Malls are reopening, temples will be buzzing, roads are already full of traffic and pollution. Fun! Also, you can start ordering all the foods you were avoiding as well. You haven’t become thinner by not eating the regular weekend pizzas anyway. May be golgappas around the street corner again? Bring it on.

What was all that drama for? Banging plates to lighting diyas? No, of course, I know that the economy has to restart but where are the masks? Why have we let our guards down? Or we just stayed home to avoid police sticks? Why the neck is the best place to put masks but not the nose and mouth? Why do we need Institutional Quarantine when cases are now skyrocketing with or without it? Why we have so many people back on the road when the cases in India are past China’s number already?

You must have seen the pics of Mumbai’s marine drive full of morning walkers with masks half-heartedly on. Or the pics of the airplanes rush when it has landed. Or beaches in US where there are more people than there usually were. Don’t you think the new normal isn’t the same old normal at all?

Bottom line is that we people are resilient and smarter than you think they are. You might or might not have seen the show ‘Space Force’ on Netflix because it is somewhat a mishmash of comedy and science fiction and tragedy and as someone rightly said a cross between ‘Veep’ and ‘The Office’, but there’s a quote in that which is somewhat on the lines of:

When people have forgotten the atrocities of World War, they forget what is like to be in a War. When people have had no polio cases for a long time, they forget the importance of Vaccines. When people become too arrogant, they forget things!

Not exactly verbatim but something similar by Gen. Naird

I am optimistic that the world will become normal again. I am pessimistic about the time. I thought it would take time to heal, but I miscalculated. I thought it would be months before we are back on the street in the usual way. But here we are already late for the office.

No titles given

What’s in the title?

Hi.
How are you, Blog?

I am okay, I think. To your surprise, it was my wife today who asked me to blog. That’s because in this Lockdown Quarantines, Alien Sounds, Locust Attacks, Thunderstorms Woes, and everything else, I have been doing only 1
thing. I have been sitting on my desk from 7.30 AM till 11.30 PM in the night. So I need to be creative again. Hence, we are here. Let me share my daily routine.

I start my day by studying from 7.30.AM. Then it metamorphosis into work as Slack starts to make sounds. Then emails galore, and then through a barrage of work stuff, I study again in the evening, and again answer to emails and try to juggle things and then I give up in the evening when Eyes and the body have no battery left.

How about you?

And heh, just to break the monotony, I make it a point to clean the dishes. To have some variety.

How’s your Work-From-Home going on?

On the studying part, it is getting more and more intense and I feel I am studying less and less. The work is becoming more and more, and days are becoming shorter.

We didn’t plan this, right? What’s happening?
Moreover, did you see that mostly everyone is back on the road, with masks.

So, what was all that drama?

Are we done with this? Was it even a thing? How come we fell prey to this? And going by the increased traffic, will the healed nature going to turn back to its way on actually ruin itself with Climate Change?

Seriously. What’s the new normal?

It is time to change a few things. Let’s reboot.