Abhinav Bhatt

Nice guys finish…

“Nice guys finish… last.”

How many of you have heard this quote?
My name is Abhinav, and I am a nice guy.

I believe that I am a nice guy because I am mostly nice to everyone. I don’t cheat in exams. I don’t honk much on the road. I pay my taxes on time. I stand during the National Anthem in the cinema hall, even when my mouth is full of popcorn. I fill in my appraisals, honestly. I don’t drink or smoke. I am also nice to animals by not eating them. But if you are a non-vegetarian, it is okay, you can be nice too. I am nice and modest. I am modest because I am saying that I am nice and I am not saying that I am great and all. Just nice. This is Toastmasters, not Boast-Masters (h/t to Jenny Locklin), after all.

In fact, I used to be very proud of being a nice guy until my college. Some time then, I used to have a crush on a classmate. I thought that I am so nice, she would never say no to me if I propose to her. When I just hinted my feelings to her, her reply changed my outlook about being nice for some time. She said, “Abhinav…”, I said “Yes…”. She said, “Abhinav, I know you are a nice guy..”. I blushed, smiled and thought, “Yes I know”. Then she said, “But… I already have a boyfriend.”

Being nice has its perks. But it also makes you a bit vulnerable. You make friends easily. But you also get friend-zoned. People consider you are reliable. But sometimes, they also take you for granted.

It is generally believed that being nice won’t take you further. You won’t be able to climb the ladders of success. You have to be clever and cunning to be successful. If you stay nice and average, you will stay nice and average. Never the best. You will lose your voice in the world where only the best of the best is praised. You will not be remembered for long.
But, let me tell you that if you are nice and average, you can achieve more than you think you can.

Despite all the odds faced by nice people, one thing is that their efforts will genuinely be remembered by other nice people. And I believe there are many nice people. Let me share a small anecdote.

I know a bit of photoshop and graphic designing and back in 2012, I made some Minimal Movie Posters which got some popularity on the Internet. Then, after a few days, I got a call. The voice at the other end said, “Hi Abhinav, I noticed your work. It is nice. Actually, I am a film-maker and I am making an Independent movie. I don’t have much cash, but could you help me by making some posters for my movie? I can pay you a bit, but not much.”. Being nice, I said, “Sure, I can try.” I made some posters for him and he paid me some amount. That movie did an alright business and life went on.

In 2016, he was making another feature film and this time, he was shooting in Bangalore. He asked all his friends in Bangalore if they wanted to be part of that movie. I pinged him and asked whether I can be a part too? He said, of course, come down and meet me. So, I went there and became a part of 2 scenes in a proper feature film.
Thus, I am nice, average and I have also worked in a movie.

So, my message to you all is that if you are nice and average, somewhere someone would take notice of you. You will get your due. All you have to do is to be nice and consistent. Never ever get bogged down with average success. Just remember, your day will come too, if not now, little later.

Lastly, when it comes to my family and educational background. In short, I come from Jaipur from a joint family. I have a younger brother and 4 cousins. I work as a Principal QA Analyst. I am married now and this speech is approved by my wife. In Toastmasters, I aim to be a nice public speaker and bring smiles to the audience.

I will leave you with this quote: “Nice guys don’t finish last. Nice guys finish, where they want to finish.” (Did Rahul Dravid say this?)
Back to Mr. Toastmaster!

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Continue reading “Nice guys finish…”

Half Time 2018

We have just crossed the mid-way of the year 2018 and are in the proverbial Half-Time period. I thought of pausing and reflecting on the journey so far in the year 2018, so the following in an effort at that.

As it is pretty clear, I didn’t live up to the promise of writing a blog post every day. I had totally intended to write at least something every day but even on the free-er days, I didn’t. So, I am going to write, in simple points on how do I feel about things after the first half of 2018 getting over in this post itself.

Good Habits are difficult to sustain

I tried a lot of things from the beginning of this year to date. Some of them and their outcomes follows:

Blogging Daily – I couldn’t do it. Reasons and excuses are many but they are not important. Can I do it? Certainly yes. Will I try again? Of course.
Bullet Journaling – Actually achievable and makes your life better. There is nothing new about journaling and planning your days ahead by writing them down but Ryder Carroll actual made it a lot systematic and formal, yet totally customizable. I started off by jotting out 5-6 things I wanted to accomplish every day before leaving for office. This was not done on an app, but I sat down and wrote them in a small notebook which could be carried without any hassle. Once I got through the planned activities, I could strike them off or if I couldn’t, I could postpone them to next day or any other suitable day. This is a good way of planning and executing. Believe me, writing things on paper and then striking them off gives you a sense of calm and helps build confidence which apps cannot. I did stop doing this when few things happened in life. But I can restart any day. And let Any day = Today. Restarting it right away! See, pausing and reflecting helps!
Toastmasters – I finished my Advanced Communication Bronze module in this May. This means I delivered 7 advanced communication speeches in 5 months this year. I learned a lot of Storytelling and Speaking to Inform and it helped build my confidence in Public Speaking further. I am now going to try to new educational program called Pathways. I haven’t set a goal yet but I do see myself finishing at least till Level 3 of this. Oh, and I made my club win the Best Social Media presence award this year out of 200 odd clubs. IFTTT rocks.
Health – I think right now I am the fattest I ever have been. My weight has been consistent since last 2 years but this time I felt the fat. So, I stopped eating sugar a few weeks back and now even after starting it again in last 2 weeks, but in lesser quantities, I don’t feel the fat. The bottom line is, I need to do more about this and continue to cut the sugar out of life.
Reading Books – When one habit derails, all the other good habits around that also derail. My Book Reading spree came to a halt but all is not lost. Let’s begin again, shall we?

All of the above also helped me end my Social Media stint. It is easy if you try.

Life is fragile

And you must handle it with care. People generally overlook problematic things in life and take everything for granted. We have limited time and it should be told to everyone every day. This year, I have been through some experiences which were the 1st time for me. To be very precise and not melodramatic, it can be summed up in 2 points.

I sat in an Ambulance for the first time for a relative who was being rushed to the hospital after collapsing suddenly. I delivered the news of the person in the ambulance passing away to the kin by myself. The passing away part happened in seconds, right before my eyes, without me even realizing it that it had happened. It happened so fast that I couldn’t even gather any thoughts about it before or after. It just taught me one thing that the transition between being alive and being dead is so small that if understood, a lot of us unnecessary efforts about unnecessary things can be avoided.
I had to experience a very close family member being diagnosed with cancer. All I could do is to motivate and instill all the positiveness I could. The family member is still fighting the battle and I hope and I wish the battle is won.

The above 2 points are so contradictory and ironical that I don’t have any conclusion about the dilemma that should we worry about death or should we let it be?

New Chapter in Life

Just a handful of days ago, I entered my 4th chapter in life if we divide life into a group of years for simplicity’s sake. Considering, we live first 0-13 years as kids and then things change. We live next 10 years i.e. 14-23 towards really jumping on to the career-building education bandwagon and then eventually crafting our careers and setting the tone for the life ahead. After 24 or 25, we reach a position where we do have a faint idea what of what we can accomplish and what we cannot (I know some people are more determined than others, and some don’t know what they want till they’re 60 too. So, I am just presenting my way of looking at age). After 30 or 32 years of life, you actually think that you know a lot and now you could give life-advises to people. Like this blog post. So, I am in that zone now. Sigh.

Alright, Half-Time Up! The 2nd half has started already and time is running out. We have some goals left in 2018 to be attempted. All the best to all those who have goals!

Featured Photo by Willian Justen de Vasconcellos on Unsplash

Toastmasters Storytelling Project 5 : S.D.D.B.

http://www.animationxpress.com/index.php/comics/graphic-india-releases-original-animated-mahabharata-series-18-days-on-youtube

American author John Hammond once said,

“The early bird gets the worm but the second mouse gets the cheese”.

Toastmaster of the day, fellow Trailblazers and welcomed guests, life is nothing but a struggle. A struggle to get things done, in the way we want. We try to convince our boss to give us a better salary. We try to convince our kids to not to spend too much time on mobile phones. We try to convince our partners to give us the remote. We even try to convince ourselves to get up early in the morning and do something about the continuous weight gain. Convincing yourself or anyone else is certainly a grueling task indeed. How do you convince yourself or anyone can define how much desperate or passionate you are? What techniques do you use to persuade others and make them follow what you want to convey?

2018, the year Hindi Music Industry died or how selling nostalgia is easy

Since I travel to and fro from work to home on a 2-wheeler, I don’t often listen to music while driving. (Those who do put earphones while riding a 2-wheeler deserve a small-non-fatal pat on their back by a more-wheeler). So, nowadays I mostly listen to music on weekends (or while doing dishes). I am not the only one but it has been observed since last 1 to 2 years that top 10 Hindi music hits comprise of at least 5-6 songs which are a rehashed version of some 80s or 90s songs. And this trend has been on a rise more so in 2018.

If you notice top songs on this list https://www.saavn.com/s/featured/hindi/Weekly_Top_Songs/8MT-LQlP35c_ or even the 2017’s top numbers on this list https://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/entertainment/hindi/bollywood/photo-features/best-hindi-songs-top-10-hindi-songs-of-2017/5-baarish/photostory/59470017.cms you will find the same stat.

Have we finished our quota of original music and lyrics in Hindi music industry? Or this fashion of remixing 90s hits as official songs of the movie has become such a thing that if some movie presents original songs, they are looked down upon?

Remixing has been there since forever. But when I was growing up, most of the remixes came out only as private pop albums. They had a very limited audience of monkey-wash-jeans-wearing teens and this genre deservedly died down in a couple of years. However, movie music is the very crux of Indian Cinema. More and more of old is being served to us and I feel our appetite is now being crushed. I don’t really remember listening to any song in last 2 years which has had a really long-lasting impact on me. Rarely any song from past couple of years has hit the right note and only a handful of songs have deserved repeated listening.

I would be wrong to say that only Hindi music industry has died, of course, it has stooped to a very low level. But Hollywood has been doing the same lately. The number of franchises which should have gone done and dusted is still continuing by putting out same content in a different wrapper year after year.

Check out this video by NerdWriter about Intertextuality in Hollywood:

I understand that it is easy to sell Nostalgia. All 90s kids will remember this and that. It is pretty easy to dole out stuff repeatedly to keep generations after generations harping on the same stuff. Star Wars released in the 1970s. Star Wars is still releasing in 2018s. The core audience is still the same. Also, our innate desire to tell our friends or spouses or offsprings about the life we live or lived or the pop culture we followed will keep fueling the fire.

I will cease to watch more Jurassic Park movies after this summer when I am done with next sequel. 🙂

So I recently watched: Tumhari Sulu, Lipstick Under My Burkha and Padmavat

Hello, it’s me!

The guy who promised to post on this blog daily and if not, at least regularly. But I have failed to deliver on my promises, like the Governments. Well, my life in the past few weeks has been really interesting which would actually make me in write so much more content than I would have done as usual. But mostly, it would be grim stuff. I would still write it, just to get it out of my system but not today. Today, I am going to post some movie reviews, which should have been posted 2 months ago. Nevertheless, assume that Women’s Day is around the corner and take the post below with a pinch of salt.

Women’s Day is around the corner. The day when skies will be pink again. The day when women can walk with pride, wearing their favorite sarees. The day when they will be given rose and chocolate, as a consolation to make them feel happy or as a guilt to just make them forget about rest of the days. The day when there will be talks, seminars, panel discussions, all chaired by men as to how can we improve lives of womenfolk. TL, DR; the day when women will be one more time fooled into being happy for a day.

I am pretty sure, I must have mentioned on this blog previously, that International Men’s Day and World Toilet Day occur on the same date. And when I tried to check this site, http://www.internationalmensday.com, I ended up on an error page. So, basically, there’s no International Men’s Day in the first place. Ironic, isn’t it.

Anyways my rant is futile. I saw 3 movies which are usually called as Women Oriented Movies. As if the movies in which an angry male beats everyone single-handedly is called a Man Oriented Movie.

So I watched Vidya Balan’s Tumhari Sulu, ensemble cast Lipstick Under My Burkha and recently Karni Sena’s Padmavat.

All the above 3 are ordered in the manner I liked them. From most to least.

Tumhari Sulu

In a yet another display of pure acting and versatility, Vidya Balan hits it out of the ground. Tumhari Sulu is a very simple story of a housewife who is not very bright academically as her sisters but has a knack for doing silly mimicry and voice modulations just for keeping her family cheerful. She plays a generally happy person who believes in herself. Being at home all day, she listens to Radio every time and duly participates and even wins in the contests they offer. By chance, she then gets a chance to be an RJ for a night show which she accepts happily. Although, this decision has left her husband (who is struggling to keep his job intact due to his new boss) with mixed reactions and her family clearly irked. Think about it, who will ‘allow’ their house-wife wives to host a radio show at night? The movie keeps the tone realistic and shows how this unusual attempt of a woman to just have a job she could do leaves her with her family in shatters when their kid elopes and husband. Rest of the movie deals with the reality check that how difficult it becomes for a woman to keep a job she likes and can do but faces so many hurdles because what she does is ‘unusual’.

Overall, I liked this movie and I will give it a thumping thumbs up.

‘Ban Ja Tu Meri Rani’ by Guru Randhawa has become one of my favorite songs of time when everything is a remix.

Lipstick…

Although this movie is technically a well made dark comedy, it makes you feel slightly weird in your mouth when it ends, as if, you have applied bright red Lipstick on your lips and you are not able to handle it. Initially you flaunt it, later you cannot stop licking it, and eventually, you are not able to take it away from your tongue.

This is one of those movies in which there are 3-4 movies in itself. All of them deal with the pressure womenfolk deal with on an ongoing basis. Some of the pressure is pretty obvious like husband not allowing her wife to work and deliberately impregnating her regularly because… well because he can. Or pressure like not able to wear what one likes. But also the unspoken but very much there, the societal pressure of not being able to just be, for example, a woman in her 50s to not have a fantasy about a character she is reading in a pulp fiction book or in simpler words not able to love again.

All the cast do justice to their roles but stand out performances are clearly by Ratna Pathak Shah and Konkana Sharma Sen (excuse me if I forgot to add another surname).

This movie makes anyone (but mostly a man like me) feel helpless. I am sensitive to all of these issues but I cannot really change it. Maybe I can change it locally to people around me but it would take a mammoth effort to actually make it work. It would mean me sacrificing a lot of things which I take granted for. Time shall tell!

Padmavat

Well, the protests against this movie were more interesting than the movie itself. Me even saying that protests were totally uncalled for would be trying to douse a fire with kerosene. I have anyways said this.

Yes, valence electron Ranveer Singh did a fab job as Khilji but what was the intention of the movie, is totally beyond me. Maybe they should have shot a really good scene between him and his slave played by Jim Sarbh. Honestly, that would have made a much more interesting love story than the highly glamorized usual palatial location royal slow-motion romantic drama between the queen and the king who have laughable Rajasthani accents. This movie is totally avoidable and we should have listened to Karni Sena. They knew that it was a time waste and an assault on our sentiments! Having said that, I really liked the filmy climax. I mean I was actually moved by the fire in Deepika’s eyes because that was the only instance she got something to do in the movie.

To conclude, I would say that till we stop using the term “women-centric” or “women-oriented” movies, we would never be able to do justice to half of the world population. Having a female lead just to sing and dance and show sympathy to the Hero should have ended decades ago. Sadly it is still on. Despite having loads of common sense, there is still a women’s day. Maybe someday, if not today.

As Prabhu Deva rightly said,

“Bhalai kabhi aurton ki, kranti ke bina nahi hogi…”

Toastmasters Storytelling Project 4 : Who will cry when you will die?

This is a story about a couple who lived in a small town named Teresopolis in Brazil. It was the golden hour time when the Sun was about to set and the shadows of the surrounding hills were engulfing the golden rays of the sun across the farmlands.

The breeze of the autumn evening was very soothing and the weather was extremely pleasant. Bob and Maria were strolling across their farm which was located in a picturesque valley near a river and a hill. It was one of those days when they were discussing the life they had lived. They had mostly lived a happy life. Bob had been a farmer all his life, while Maria used to run a bakery. They weren’t very rich but they believed they had enough. They always loved what they did and they were satisfied with how the life had turned out for them. They didn’t have any regrets but they had only one thing missing in their happy life. They had no kids of their own. Many of their friends had told them about adopting one. But they believed that it was their fate so they had happily accepted it.

On their way, back to their home, they noticed some squeaking noise coming from somewhere nearby. They tried to locate the source of the sound but didn’t see anything. Bob walked towards the barbed wire boundary of their farm and noticed something. He called Maria. Maria asked him what was there? He just kept on smiling. Maria then went and found a small puppy struggling to cross the boundary and come into their farm. The small brown puppy had somehow entangled its body halfway and couldn’t cross or go back. Its watery eyes and his small cute squeaks sought for help. Bob carefully removed the pup. As soon as the puppy got free, it started licking Bob’s boot and fluttered its tail to show his love and gratitude. He handed it over to Maria and told her to take care of their new guest. Maria smiled back and took the puppy into her hands and gave it a small kiss on the forehead. Sun had almost set now. They took him back to their home and fed him.

Since the puppy didn’t seem to have anyone looking for it, they thought of taking care of it. They had a big farm to look after and the puppy had enough space to play around. Their bond kept on getting stronger and stronger. The petite canine made them young again. They used to feed him, take care of him, pet him and Bob used to take him for a walk while tending to his farm. They started to see their unborn kid in the little dog. They named him Leao.

Years passed. Leao had grown up now and the Bob and Maria had got slightly older. Life had become much happier since the advent of Leao. The feeling of not having their own kid had now subsided. The family of Bob, Maria and Leao were happy and content.

One day, there was a forecast of heavy rain and a violent storm in the town. The growl of the wind was turning more and more violent. The skies had turned dark gray and the storm was becoming more and more dangerous. Bob shut the house door and he along with Maria and Sam thought of staying indoors as the forecast was of heavy rain. It kept on raining all night. They thought that they were pretty safe in the confinements of their house but it wasn’t to be. Due to heavy rain, the river developed flood-like situation and the water overflowed. This was one of the most brutal floods in Brazil in recent times. Several hundred lost their lives and many were dislocated. Bob and Maria struggled to keep themselves safe but unfortunately, they got the bad luck when their house was washed away by the strong currents and heavy winds.

Leao survived though. The very next day when the rains stopped and flood subsided, their bodies were found near a tree which had somehow stopped them from flowing into the river. The town authorities dug mass graves for the deceased. They buried Bob and Maria along with the other unfortunate souls. Leao had no place to go now. But Leao didn’t want to leave his parents. So, he stayed near their grave for days. After not leaving the grave for 7 days, eventually, Leao understood that his parents won’t return back.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1347862/Brazil-floods-Dog-refuses-leave-owners-graveside-death-toll-tops-630.html

I will leave you with a question to ponder. Have you done anything good for someone? Have you ever given a thought to the question: Who will cry, when you will die?

Continue reading “Toastmasters Storytelling Project 4 : Who will cry when you will die?”

Breaking the habit

To those who can blog every day, kudos to you. I know I thought and proudly announced that I was going to blog every day here, I have failed. Miserably!

Last post here was on February 19th, 2018. And today is April 8th, 2018. I am using an app to track habits and my blogging streak looks like this.

I am certainly not proud of this. But, I have an excuse. I have been busy doing work in the office and then I had to carry it along to my home and then had to continue doing that till I had no energy left but to sleep. I have been working for just a few months shy of 10 years and hours-wise, this is the most I have worked at a stretch. Of course, it doesn’t mean I have done the most productive work of my life. But I have enjoyed the struggle to give it as much as possible. And funnily, it isn’t over yet. But I needn’t keep awake till late nights. So, quantitatively work-wise, I have been proud of myself. My shoulders and lower back has pained because of work for the first time. This might sound totally non-sense but whatever. Enjoying work till you start snatching your hair out is also enjoyment.

So, will I be back to regular blogging? Not sure. Will I try? Of course yes.

Also, few updates: I also didn’t blog because I had gone back to home for Holi. Also, I think I am not going to publicize my blog on Twitter and Facebook anymore. I am done with those sites. Those who want to follow my blog, they can either subscribe to this in their feed readers. Or maybe, I don’t know for sure, I will start a fortnightly newsletter thingy which might have abridged posts which anyone can subscribe via email. I have watched many movies, TV shows, read some books, etc, so just to come back to the habit, my next few posts would be their reviews. So, till then, keep smiling till you have teeth.

Also, Casey Neistat is back with his regular vlogging, so why not I take inspiration and keep this thing going.

Author Archives: Abhinav Bhatt