Author: Abhinav Bhatt

  • FU News: Uber for protests launched

    FU News: Uber for protests launched

    In an interesting turn of events, a startup company, which earlier dealt with raw materials for arranging a protest like placards, banners, stones, unemployed youth, and water cannons (if you happen to be in their right books), has launched an Android App, ‘Stonr : The Dharna App’. This app has been made to meet the increasing demands of protests.

    Stonr: Uber for Protests

    “There is a huge demand for arranging various things for a successful protest. So we thought, it is worthwhile to invest in Stonr”, its founder said. With this app, you needn’t worry about logistics of a protest. You can just enter the location, timing, headcount and tentative number of stones required and voila! the app take cares of the rest. Any jobless youth interested in protesting, can register themselves as ‘Protestrs’ and find any nearby protests and can join in. Whenever there is lack of material and protesters, the app provides a ‘Surge’ where joinees will get free caps, and a 2 minute primer of the cause of protest, in case any journalist asks.

    The app is based on a freemium model where first protests will be free provided you use the promocode ‘DHARNA’. Afterwards, the protestee will have to pay a sum of Rs. 100,000 per protest for 100 protesters and Rs. 250 thereon for more headcount per person.

    The app is currently available only on Android but soon it will be on other OS too. ‘Stonr’ has already started getting traction and has had 2 Million downloads. Unicorns like HardBank and U-Capital have shown intentions to invest in the app and they value it in billions already.

    App Screenshots via Freepik.com

    Disclaimer: FU News is Fake Unconfirmed News.

  • So I recently watched: The Social Dilemma

    Most probably you will read this on your phone with numerous notifications lurking around for your attention which will prevent you from reading this completely. If you had clicked a link to reach here, the link would be from Facebook, or Twitter, or LinkedIn, or some other social media site. There is nothing I can write here which can make you use social media sites less frequently. I have close to zero persuasive power to ask you to keep your phone away and do something better with your life. But, let me give another try.

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  • When Sniper’s Red Dot is on your forehead

    When Sniper’s Red Dot is on your forehead

    To quote one guy on Instagram, recently I had the fortunate experience of writing a few online exams. I had written about the adrenaline rush of writing an exam itself but to top all that, the real fun is when you have to keep your video on and a proctor is looking at your moves.

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  • Here’s some unsolicited advice for you

    Here’s some unsolicited advice for you

    Some people have a personality that makes you believe that they can be bothered for personal advice. They have an air of stability and sound decision making. They look like if you tell them your secrets, they will keep them end-to-end encrypted.

    When I was in college, few friends were open to telling me about their crushes and stuff, assuming that I won’t reveal. Something made them think that I, for one, won’t interfere, and second, might guide them further. I did guide them and today they are happily married. To someone else, of course. I lured the others to actually reveal their secrets by sending them a link to share their 3 crushes and then reading their responses. Phishing and college pranks and whatnot.

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  • Wordplay

    • Listen and Silent are made up of the same letters.
    • Anger is 1 letter away from Danger.
    • Empty – mpty – mpt – mt – ____ mean the same thing.
    • Paronomasia (pun) is pretty close to Paranoia.
    • Having a funny WIFI name is okay. Real bravado is when you share the password.

    Source: I don’t remember.

    Photo by Mareko Tamaleaa on Unsplash

  • Return it Easy Policy

    Return it Easy Policy

    In 1994, when Prabhudeva danced on the top of a transparent bus to woo some girls in the Tamil movie Kadhalan, he didn’t realize that inadvertently, he was peddling some common Indian antics.

    • Stalking while putting life in danger
    • Climbing on the buses because who needs AC
    • Basically, Taking it Easy Policy
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  • Paying Back

    Paying Back

    Some days ago, I read about a Banker, who was once a student from not a very well-to-do family. When he got admission as a student at BIT, Mesra, he didn’t have money to travel for the counseling. One of his teachers lent him Rs. 500. The student couldn’t be happier. Later, when he tried to pay back, the teacher had changed jobs and he could never payback.

    Recently, it was known that the student, has now become MD of IDFC Bank and he gifted that teacher, shares worth Rs. 30 Lacs. Because he had helped him in his earlier days.

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  • FU News: Human Neck to get longer, evolution study reports

    FU News: Human Neck to get longer, evolution study reports

    Oct 11, 2020 – Tawang, India

    In a throat grabbing study published by the unscientific group ‘Evolution World Wide’ (aka Eww), it was noted that the next version of Humans will have longer necks, as long as evolution stays as a fact.

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  • So I recently watched: The Boys

    So I recently watched: The Boys

    Brash. Brutal. Brouhaha!

    I have seen Superhero themed TV shows and movies in abundance by now. There have been amazing openings in numerous shows which hooked you from the word go. But there has been no show which opened like ‘The Boys’. Within the first 5 to 6 minutes, you are introduced to the Queen Maeve (Wonderwoman) and The Homelander (Superman/Captain America) in all their slow-motion glory. You say to yourself, okay another Superhero show, let’s see how it goes. Then all of a sudden, another Superhero A-Train (The Flash or the Quicksilver counterpart) runs through the protagonist’s girlfriend Robin. Read the last sentence again. Then you realize what just happened. One has to see it to believe it. It is like you are just served a good looking delicious plate of food. And as soon as you pick it up to take your first bite, it bites you instead.

    You thought that Nolan’s Batman was quite realistic. Then you thought, no Snyder was more realistic. Then Marvel movies took you away from realism and bowled you over with fantastical imagery while their TV shows tried to keep the tone as dark and grittier, going the DC way.

    Meanwhile, few other Superhero related themes were running and creating their own places as the undercurrent. Case in point: Watchmen. But then, there comes a new show based on Comics of the same name, which shakes every pre-conceived notion about Superhero movies/TV series.

    The Boys, available on Amazon Prime Video, is a Superhero show in which Superheroes are people who have gotten immense power and that has corrupted them like anything. They are managed by a corporate ‘Vought’, they star in their own movies, and they use their powers to do anything unimaginable, utterly horrifying, and unspeakable. In fact, some things are even un-writable. They are pitted against normal humans without any superpower and the group which takes on the corrupted Superheroes is named ‘The Boys’, even when there is a girl in the team.

    The Superheroes, led by Homelander (and the team is called The Seven like the Avengers or the Justice League) are almost unconquerable. They have power, money, people behind them, and access to all the possible ways to cover their misdeeds. On the other side, we have The Boys, led by the most-amazing Billy Butcher (Karl Urban), a group of underground, ex-convicts, ex-military/CIA, poor victims, and an Asian girl who like to talk with her hands instead of her mouth. Basically, a bunch of misfits. The fight is one-sided and the situation is pretty much a David vs Goliath fight.

    That’s what makes it super-fun to watch.

    The Boys is a gory and dark tale where humans take on superheroes and try to pin them one by one in unique ways. It is totally unwatchable while having food, and I mean it as a compliment. It takes blood spilling to a whole another level as they try to up the ante episode after episode. I am pretty sure that people who easily tolerated Game of Thrones’ violent scenes, just because everyone was talking about it, will not be able to handle The Boys. That actually makes the show more worth.

    The ensemble cast is just brilliant. Homelander, the main superhero but also the main antagonist, played by Anthony Starr, is deeply menacing and he represents all the wrong political and social connotations that come with power. Billy Butcher, the main protagonist is a 100% scene-stealer, and each time he is on screen, you are bound to have deadly one-liners, in a Kiwi-English accent, are thrown at you with the speed of light. The CGI is top-notch which is a huge thing going in the favor of the series. BG music is easily worth saving as a playlist. Thank you for officially introducing me to Billy Joel.

    There have been 2 seasons out yet and it demands all your attention, comic-book shows lovers. Go watch!

  • Desperate House-Husbands

    Desperate House-Husbands

    Let’s directly talk about the Elephant in the room. Has anyone ever spared any thoughts about Husbands who are still stuck at homes while their wives go to office daily if the wives work in the Essential Services Industries (can have acronym Esi., but jobs aren’t that easy, of course)?

    I doubt! House-Husbands (in these times specifically) are a rare breed. Most families where both Husbands and Wives went to the office are still Working from Home (how are people still tolerating each other is beyond me). Might have gotten rather used to it! Households, where wives were predominantly home-makers, are in a dilemma, whether to be happy that husbands are at home full time or be sad that husbands are at home full time. But, House-Husbands are not in large numbers, are they? They need to be appreciated for their efforts, isn’t it? But poor House-Husbands don’t know anything because they didn’t choose their lives to be this way. This just happened. Who can help them out? Who can put them out of their misery? Who can empower them and alleviate their pains? Nobody.

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