Writing Experiment Lab | Poe's Law Playground
Pretty sure that I am not doing any justice with this but a very small contribution to the best city in the universe. (There’s a huge scope for adding so many more but publishing what I could make in whatever time I can spare nowadays. Sigh.)
For you Jaipur,
Apple is going to have its coveted event on 9.9.14 and will probably bring another revolutionary device, as people assume. It has been 30 years since Mac arrived. It was a revolutionary product back then in 1984 when personal computing was still a far-fetched joke for the geeks and nerds. However, soon Windows arrived and whatever Microsoft did, by hook or crook, changed Apple. The same is happening again.
In 2007, iPhone arrived and changed the course of how the mobile phones will be made in future. This is 2014 and we have already forgotten 2007. While Samsung has been the real competition, several other small players using Android OS has actually shaken Apple heavily.
Before I start my rant, let me tell I don’t own any Apple product except iTunes. Wait, let me confirm. Yes, all my vital organs are intact, so yes, I don’t own any Apple product. And before 2013, I had never used any Apple product myself. But then I was an Apple fanboy. (See!) Then by chance, I got to work on Apple machines for office work and I started hating them because of their closed and rigid design and the non-stop crashing of Microsoft and Oracle applications made for Mac. I had no problems with the native Apple applications ever however. Also, the hardware design is so brilliant that no other machine comes close to it.
So after using a Mac for 1 year and developing a good bit of hatred because its hype and non-flawlessness (and because I was officially working on it) I just started using Windows again and felt the difference. One kind of misses the Mac and its solid hardware software integration because Windows seems so fragile and made of low quality plywood over which if you stand, it might break. So while writing this, I like Mac better but since it is SO COSTLY STILL and non-flawlessness, I don’t know whether I am an Apple fanboy anymore or not. My stance towards Windows is still same, that is, its just okay. Now let me come to the main motive of this post.
I think there are a few things which once created, don’t belong to the creator. For instance, Language and few forms of arts. Urdu for instance cannot belong to Muslims, as it is treated in India. Similarly, more importantly infact, Sanskrit is linked to Hindus but I think Languages cannot be held married to a certain religion. Same goes with Programming languages. C language was invented in early 70s and still being used all over the world for several purposes. Because it was Open Source (as in anyone can write a program in C, just with a compiler), it has flourished. Similarly, the art like dance. Michael Jackson might have patented the Anti-Gravity move but how can you stop anyone from doing it? The concept of patent itself is honest but used ferociously because people misuse and abuse them. I mean, patent was created so that the person who invented gets royalty and respect and while the other person uses it, gives the creator due credit for the labor one invested in creating the thing. Take the example of Elon Musk. His company Tesla Motors recently announced that anyone is allowed to use their technology to create better things. Such a nice gesture and totally Anti-Apple where using rounded corners by other companies had become such a huge issue. Now when it comes to music, if one creates a tune/song, in today’s world, it would take seconds to bootleg/rip it and be put online somewhere for free download. Being snobby while being an artist cannot work. Indian Ocean band stopped selling their stuffs and now rely only on their stage performance where they charge an entry fee because they thought that there art suffered because of snobbery of record publishing music companies. Lucky Ali’s last album Rastaman, was uploaded for free download.
Now when it comes to graphic design, one visual form can be adapted by anyone and can use it anywhere. Respect comes when you acknowledge from where you got the inspiration. Everyone cannot do that.
I recently got a Whatsapp forward (which I might have got 10 years ago in email but there are somethings you have to bear when you are in Whatsapp groups) which talked about Bangalore’s antics. So I thought of making few posters on the points I felt poster-able. Some of them have been my personal experiences and other are based on the text itself.
And hey Bangalore/Bengalooroo/Bengaluru, don’t outrage, you know I like you.
For better resolution, please click here: https://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=a.675437592541523.1073741856.216906945061259&type=1
Credits:
Used some of the material used in the posters from these sites:
http://all-free-download.com/
http://9031.com/goodies/
“All I asked was just 20 Rupees extra on the meter but she gave me an exasperated stare and walked away. Arey, at least I agreed to go by meter!”.
I am just an Autorickshaw-Driver, nothing fancy about it. Is that the way to treat me? She came to me, I didn’t go to her. Well anyways, this is how my day goes usually. I thought, why not jot down some of my feelings and day-to-day experiences, which might make the customers, understand my plight before giving me a flight. Thus, I have asked one of my customers to lend me his blog so that I can share a bit about my life because I don’t get time to blog owing to my extremely busy schedule.
As I was sleeping in my Auto, (Trivia: people of Mumbai call it Rick, people of Hyderabad call it Aeto) very early in the morning at around 9 AM, 2 guys came to me and woke me up. Without any decency they asked me if I would go to MG Road? Rubbing my eyes and yawning simultaneously, I nodded my head in negation nonchalantly. Who wants to go there in the peak time anyways! I shooed them away and went to sleep again. It was so hot and sleeping in an Auto is not a comfortable thing I tell you. You have to crouch to fit on the back seat and then place your legs over the driver’s seat to ease.
After 10 odd minutes, another guy in formals like Karan Thapar and a face as sophisticated as Yogendra Yadav approached and asked me if I was willing to go to Whitefield. This guy looked liked an IT guy so I told him ‘Alright, 150 Rupees only’. He said, ‘No no, it costs only 60’. Now, firstly, everyone knows that these IT guys are mighty rich. They can spend 1000s in just half an hour drinking at posh pubs. Can’t they even spare such meager amount on Travel? ‘Tch tch what saar, so much traffic there and no sawaari from there back to here’, I told him. He didn’t look like the bargaining ones so he readily agreed. We started and after a super fast extent of 10 seconds, came to a standstill thanks to a traffic jam. It took 20 minutes to move 100 m and technically I should’ve asked for 500 Rupees from him but since I agreed to take him for a ride in just 150, I couldn’t ask for more. So I told him that because of this headache of a jam, I would take 20 more and drive faster further. He said he was okay with it but insisted to avoid driving like Rajinikanth. We eventually reached his destination safe and sound as I had promised.
And to everyone’s surprise, there was no returning sawaari at all for at least a Kilometer. After which I found a lady walking with an umbrella in the hot sun. I thought I should help her and asked if she wanted to go somewhere. Reluctantly she said she was heading towards KR Puram but she will go only by meter. I agreed because I couldn’t see her walking, panting and cursing Awesome Bangalore Weather in the summer. We started peacefully but the peace was soon shattered when she took out her phone and started discussion her daily chores with someone on phone. I don’t think she even paused for breath but was continuously blabbering her office live issues, her daily life issues, her shopping woes, her husband’s excuses and lies and even her cat’s tantrums. I could have written her biography if she has continued the transcription. I even stared at her through the mirror overhead so that she could distract but there was no stopping. As soon as I dropped her and took a sigh of relief, I found another elderly gentleman who wanted to go Marathalli. It felt like the day was going smooth but as soon as we reached a flyover, the auto broke down. Hmpfh. I had checked everything just a night ago and everything was working top notch. Unfortunately I had to ask the old man to get down and pay 50 Rupees so that I could push the auto myself till the next service station. He was infuriated but couldn’t do anything. At least I didn’t ask him to help me push the auto. He should have looked at his age for God’s sake.
Well, this is how my day usually goes by. People consider us inhumane, I consider people inhumane. Each and every day we help people reach their destinations come what may rain and thunderstorm but people don’t appreciate that. We ask for some extra money because it is bloody tough out there. Fighting Inflation and regularly bribing police personnel is not a child’s play. So I hope next time you aboard another auto, think of me. Thanks to the blogger for letting me use his blog. See you.
Enjoy this till then.
<p><a href=”http://vimeo.com/43397805″>FOR HIRE! – BANGALORE RICKSHAW</a> from <a href=”http://vimeo.com/xylophon”>Xaver Xylophon</a> on <a href=”https://vimeo.com”>Vimeo</a>.</p>I can’t promise to not put up a candid inked selfie of my index finger after I vote tomorrow. It has been such a long time I last voted, in 2009 twice and both the times, the people for whom I voted, lost. Well, voting is the least I can do to contribute something to the country, if not pollution, population and generally dissing the system. And I am excited about voting. (baby!)
Everyone wants to believe that they’re important. Everyone wants to express and believe that people listen to them. That’s why we post status messages on Facebook and Tweet about what are eating for dinner. But when it comes to expressing about who they want to see as their political leader, you are bombarded with aggressive replies, showered with cynicism and painted some-tard by the others and occasional shoe hurlings DUCK!. I will try with this post to ruffle your hair with love and affection and ask you to please vote this time to make you feel important. If you want, I will accompany you to a pub too, if that helps (but I won’t drink and you will pay for my nachos at least).
People need to understand how important is it to vote, and donate blood and I want to push you to do both. If you are anaemic then just vote. I know that you’re thinking that voting and blood donation is almost the same thing although the latter is voluntary. Personally speaking from my life experience, I never forced anyone to do anything but I suggest you to try voting. I don’t even request anyone to do anything but doing small bits for the society can give you more happiness than eating Mangoes if you’re diabetic. No seriously, the contestants will always be dubious criminal minded shady people but we have to choose the least shady from them. This has been the trend always and will continue to be in future till Robots take over. Not only you can feel pride and sense of importance, but you can at least have a say in some way rather than sitting at home and cribbing about system. I don’t think I have convinced you but let’s say, do it for showing off to people that you voted. That should convince you.
Now the question is whom to vote. Good that you asked because this is very important. See, this is India’s General Election (special actually) to select National Government. You’re going to select the people who are going to formulate national and international level policies. Please note that they are not going to fix the road outside your home, no. That’s state government’s job. Union govt. deals with bigger problems. Like taxes and major economic policies which can impact your wallet directly, railways, defence, deciding on next India Pakistan cricket matches, issue of that nonsense 15 kg baggage limit in domestic flights, etc. Now do you want people who ruled us for more than 60 years and gave us ‘Babaji’s Thullu’ by doing less than what they could or those who look more decisive, (better orators?), less family oriented and mildly less corrupt (but surrounded by idiots who want to decide which colour you should wear while going to cinema) or you want people who appeared very honest and refreshing change but totally TRP hungry which means they could have been a great alternative to first two but they turned out to be only couch potato freaks who just make noise and do nothing. The last sentence turned out to be pretty long but you cannot get goodies unless you spend little energy in choosing your leaders who are going to represent your country.
So go out with your voter ID card (or any other valid document), don’t take your phone with you, reach the polling booth, do the formalities and press the bloody EVM hard so that it beeps and registers your vote like anything.
I would still go out with you if you at least tried to vote but couldn’t get your name listed in the electoral list. If you don’t want to vote just because everyone is an idiot, just remember that the fight will always between a Giant Douche and Turd Sandwich (South Park reference) so you have to choose one to be counted.
P.S.: Well, this selfie is a stupid word IMHO. Suicide is also a kind of selfie, right?
It is slightly difficult being an Atheist, I feel. Without enraging a lot of people, one cannot follow/unfollow what one wants, when one wants, religion-wise. Personally, I do think there’s a higher (or lower but what is up and down) power which somehow controls things to avoid falling into one another but I also think that for the higher power, I am equally important as the electric poles which are used by dogs. So I am confused about the category of my religious inclination towards something I don’t understand.
In few years I will be reaching 30. Sigh. (And you’re not getting any younger either by the way, so don’t smirk). And since I can conclude that I have lived at least 1/3rd of my life already, I have become more confused than clear about the concept of religion. Too much Breaking Bad, South Park, Game of Thrones and real life examples of dwindling morals seen in the trailing part of 20s did me in. I decided that I am now going to question my beliefs and ask questions, wherever possible. Except Quora as I mostly see joke answers there now.
It was observed that most of the beliefs I had (as a Hindu) are just because of traditions. Since it is traditionally been followed since years, we have to follow it. May be they started as suggestions to keep people disciplined and that was that. But now people follow them just following the herd mentality. Don’t get haircut on Tuesday. Why? May be in the Vedas, it was mentioned that barbers had an off day on Tuesday which turned to a superstition eventually. Don’t eat certain things in Navratra and other times, it is alright to do anything. Moreover, I don’t feel like pleasing Gods to get things done for myself. What is the need to bribe God through praying? God is like your traffic police, is it? Going to temples is anyways not a necessity in my religion (yes seriously) because if God is omnipresent, he/she can directly understand what you’re thinking anyways. And how selfish are you to ask things from God again and again? Not a good habit. Religions have mostly led to hatred and illogical debates which pleased nobody except the politicians. It has always created divide and disharmony among humans, isn’t it? Morality and religion need not coincide and as Rust Cohle says ‘If the only thing keeping a person decent is the expectation of divine reward then, brother, that person is a piece of shit.’.
But then important question is that what is the need of religion. Why do we need to be tethered to a religion to keep ourselves grounded?
There are so many advantages of Religion as well, aren’t there? The advantages outnumber the disadvantages? Let me try to list them and see.
1. Stress Buster
When one is down and out (because of traffic and life in general) and have nobody around to share, a shoulder to care (for the rhymes), a temple be it of any religion can be a great place for solace. The silence there can cure stress better than paying loads of cash at some Ashram++ to detox yourself. Oh, Internet works in that case too by the way. (I should mention that I don’t support the culture of preaching and loud speakers reciting parody songs at religious places.)
2. Underground Bunkers
When wars happen, places of worship are spared for sometime (I may be wrong) because most of the non-atheists fears God. So that place can be safer than the rest. Unless of course the war is itself religion based. In that case, build an underground bunker and stay there for minimum 18 days and don’t come out even if I say it is safe to come out.
3. Holiday Planning
But the best part about religion are the Holidays and the Festivals. We get at max 10 official holidays, 3 of which happened to be Secular (read Indian National) holidays. Now as an atheist, what right do I have to ask for such Holidays. I once wished someone Happy Diwali on Whatsapp and the reply I got was ‘Happy Holiday’. Anyways, if we followed more than one religion, we would enjoy a lot more. With religious holidays comes great sweets and other eatables. And the purpose of life is to relish those sweets, isn’t it? The buildup to these festivals is exciting in itself. Who cares that why the festival is celebrated. Important is that it is celebrated and we get a chance pollute environment and waste water! If Crime is done as a religious belief, everything is spared, right? But getting holidays is always welcome, isn’t it?
We have to decide ourselves whether we want long weekends or unnecessary stress because we didn’t fast on Karwachauth.
P.S.: Don’t confuse the title with Confucianism but may be they’re confused too. Ooh.
There’s a garden near my apartment which ‘was’ used by the people for jogging, playing milder outdoor games and good old sitting and chatting (and romancing). Since last month, it has been taken over by birds from far and wide and humans have been ousted. Cool, I say!
Those birds are probably migratory, as there’s a lake nearby but isn’t this in itself a feat! The whole place is now white in color thanks to the bird’s shit and it smells like a chicken cage. But people cannot go there anymore. A lock has been installed outside the gate and place is now indefinitely inaccessible for humans. Isn’t this a rare occasion? A garden 500 square meter right between the city surrounded by houses from all sides has now been taken away from people.
I guess this is a very minute example of the fact that we humans take our self too seriously. We plan, build and live considering that everything is permanent while it is far from being even temporary. Whenever nature decides to take it back it does and we can just be mere spectators.
Probably soon, the municipal corporation will shoo away the birds by hook or crook as the neighbors have complained about the dangerous of diseases. What about the diseases we’ve given to these birds?
