How to be a Complete Man?

People who are familiar with TV advertisements of 1990s and 2000s might have seen the Raymond’s advertisement where the tagline used to be “The Complete Man”. That tagline has faded now because kids back then used it a lot to make joke about transgenders. Making jokes about them is a complete no-no nowadays. But the phrase ‘The Complete Man’ stayed in mind and turned out to be very much mind-boggling. What is a complete man? What is complete in first place? What traits should a man have which make him complete? Moderately tall physique with slightly fairer than the 3rd level of skin complexion (as measured on Fair & Handsome crème’s fairness meter), highly refined voice with an apt frequency of 1.75 words delivered in a second which can be understood by only those who pay attention or a highly successful career as a Colony level acclaimed sportsperson (Cricket, Football, Hockey, Golf and Badminton) during late 90s and early 2000s are some of the criteria which define an almost complete man. Dimple optional. Enough about me, but still it takes a lot more to be complete.

Before you try to imitate any of the above given features, you must remember the most important trait a complete man has. That is to respect women. Although it is the easiest but still nobody follows this simple rule. Not even I. Err, don’t throw eggs, wait let me explain. In spite of all the good qualities I claim to have, one thing which kept me thinking for some time made me write this.

I travel to my office in a Bangalore metropolitan transport corporation city bus. The office is around 15 KMs from my place and thanks to the dependence on traffic conditions, it can take around 25-75 minutes to reach the destination. So when I say, I will be there in 10 minutes, don’t believe me. Now, the bus has a capacity of, umm, err, say 60 seats, about 20 of them are reserved. 15 reserved for women and 5 for Differently abled people. If you travel in the non-ac BTMC buses, you will find that usually no men occupy the reserved seats. Point to note is that the non-ac buses are mostly used by those people who cannot afford Auto Rickshaw. Frankly, nobody can afford Auto Rickshaw without leasing out your kidneys but still, those are Not-So-Rich class people. So those not-so-rich people do understand that some seats are reserved for women so they better get seated at the rear side general area. However, the Volvo AC Bus, which is usually used by those who are willing to shed some money in order to get the comfort and speed, are not that intelligent enough. People travelling in Volvo grab any seat they find, leaving a lot of ladies standing. Now, before you grab my collar and punch my jaw out, let me clarify that I don’t sit on the reserved seats. I usually go back and find a seat at the back side of the bus, and if there isn’t any, I keep standing.

Now consider the scenario which makes me an almost but not yet complete man. Suppose all the reserved seats are full and there is only 1 seat left vacant in the general area of the bus. Still there is one lady (lady means elder than me in general sense here) and I are in the bus without the seats and we both have equal opportunities to grab that seat. In this predicament, I let the lady to get the seat. Now am I the complete man? No because consider a scenario further.

Suppose there are no seats left in the bus and then a lady boards the bus. Do I get up and offer her the seat? Unless the lady is at least double my age and I am not considerably fresh and alive, I don’t. I had logic for this which has now shattered like career of Boxer Vijendra Singh. I used to think that in a city like Bangalore, both men and women get equal opportunities and earn almost the same (I hope). Also, as I have seen in the office, apart from the gossips about affairs and clothes (haha joking), women work equal to what men do. So, since we both are equals, there is no point in me standing up for a woman in a Volvo AC bus or any bus for that matter for any rich poor class. Just there, I missed my opportunity to be the complete man. My logic falls flat on its face when I realize that a woman’s work doesn’t stop in office alone. Not only she faces the same ordeal a man has to go travelling to and fro from office to home and working for 9 hours, but she also has to take care of the house. And, before you again grab my collar bone (as you already tore my collar off in the Para above) and break my nose, when I say she has to take of the house, is that usually she is the home maker, as she can manage the house in a better way. She has to manage the maids, the cooks, the cleanliness, the kids (if any) and other stuff like spending time on make-up. She does double the work a man does because men just reach home, jump on the sofa and start watching TV while the lady brings him water (talking about my future, heh). Hey, don’t grab me again, I am talking about 21st century only. So, all in all, a woman who is standing in the bus, trying to get a seat deserves more than I do. Be it a woman of any age, she still does more work after going home than an average guy does. <b>And hence, I should always offer her (girl, woman, aunty) the seat</b>. Unless of course, she is not interested in sitting at on the rear side amongst the company of men.

From now on, I expect myself to follow this simple principle and try to be a complete man from now on. Let’s see.

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Dhanya April 25, 2013 Reply

At least you realize what it takes to be a complete man 🙂 Not many guys (at least in Mallu land) understand the need for respecting women and often women are considered inferior. They don’t think the way you do. Kudos to you for this Abhinav.

AB April 26, 2013 Reply

I am still trying to be one. Bangalore has great encouragement if one tries good things!

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