Skin Whitening Shit

Whether you were near or away from the Equator,
You ought to have the tone which you assumed to be better

You tried to apply balm, creams, multi-colored ointments,
Still, you couldn’t get rid of the obvious resentments

Did you think it was NOT because of the color of your skin?
Or your short-sightedness or your current/last birth’s sin

You gave up, gave in and considered yourself inferior,
You let them have it, for superficial fun, you ruined your interior

How does it matter, what is the shade you have now, your life’s up for bids
You learned it from your elders and taught the same to your kids

Be Black, White and Asian like panda, they said
But you handed over your soul to the rules they laid

Hands up Panda!

Hands up Panda!

Till when will you wait, to raise your voice?
Most of it anyways will fade into the noise

It would work better if you could do see a bit,
First stop applying yourself any Skin Whitening Shit

Continue reading →

An Ode to the Bengaluru Road

Gone are those days, when people’s talking taste was only about Weather and Traffic. The new talk of the town, hey smile.. don’t frown, is the locations of potholes so specific.

They add to the beauty, and act as the dimple, oh road you cutie! They’re spread across everywhere in the city. They don’t spare anyone, a pedestrian or a wheeler, but only the helicopters and that’s a pity.

They are spread across all the roads in a peculiarly random fashion. You might avoid one, or may be even 2, but you cannot help but get into another and learn a quick driving lesson.

Because where else will you get such a lovely training to drive and BONUS: open your senses to the unpicked garbage’s stench for free? With increase in concentration and ability to stretch, (the answer is everywhere in the country).

Some manholes would be open, some would be absent. Some men will fall and become God’s tenant. Some holes would be wide, some will be narrow. If you haven’t bathe since yesterday, it will rain again 2 days in a row, carry an umbrella or you can take open shower tomorrow.

You have nothing to lose. It will only make you good, while driving with one hand as and putting the other to cover your no(o)se.

The randomness of the holes cannot be measured but at least that’s what makes them something to be treasured. As one survives the potholed lanes, one finally reaches the city’s foamy veins.

I saw one guard, stopping a cameraman from taking the pics of one of the lathery Lake. But all in vain as the froth was in full flow, lake gave everyone around a low blow, we inhaled more toxin than the pics that he could ever take.

So is the condition everywhere in Monsoon, or otherwise. The asphalt is laid but withers away too soon, and we keep tolerating it like common loons. We cannot be optimistic or get our hopes up because whatever dream of development you have, will, for optical fibre cable, get dug up.

An Ode to ISRO

In a country like India, there are extreme contrasts in status of living. While we have the poshest malls with sleek interiors and shiny billboards, just few hundred meters from there, we can have poverty ridden neighborhoods which lack even basic necessities like water and spaces to live. We have metros swooshing over a bridge and can have families living under the same bridges oblivious to the rush above. We are known to move 4 steps forward and 2 steps backward in even things like common civic sense. Our Prime Minister has to explicitly mention about things like cleanliness and toilets even after almost 7 decades of Independence. I can go on and complain about things which are wrong in our country, but I will stop here.

This post is for the things that work and how!

In a country where people change their utmost important appointments due to some celestial object just transitioning another and thereby blocking our line of view of the latter creating a ‘sootak‘, we also have people who are constantly pushing the boundaries of what Indians (and humans) are capable of.

This is for ISRO.

When first humans set foot on the moon
the whole world moved and began to swoon
we also fluttered a bit while still in infancy
started things of our own, though not so fancy

25 days after that giant leap
a small org in India came into being
we were still young and just getting the hang
we started our own, though not with a big bang

Then PM met scientist Sarabhai, joined hands at par
and ISRO got formed from INCOSPAR
with humble beginnings and challenges that mar
it had to overcome them all and travel very far

You are drastically poor and can’t feed your own people
you still use bullock carts as your national vehicle
what are you going to achieve, they always asked
do tasks to mask your poverty, rather than trying to bask

They said, damn, you don’t need a space programme
It won’t work, it will all be a sham,
Just pray for the rain, you are a country of farmers
Harvest food not ideas, anyways you are just snake charmers

But

Some people relented and counter-challenged the challenge
They knew that they had it in themselves, ignored the barrage
Motive was not to display our astronomical might
But it was to give wings to the hope and push it to flight

Since ages India has always been keen in astronomy // and also astrology 🙂
it derailed in between but had to again get autonomy
From Zero to Mysore’s rockets, we always had sound minds
Hungry we might have been, but hungry also for other kinds

So it quietly worked and kept breaking new grounds
Sent several satellites and successes kept doing rounds
With every launch, it generates more and more amaze
It always fazes the doubts, but without hoopla or craze

The people there are, are totally unlike celebrities
The things they do, needs precise degree of alacrity
with apron clad gentlemen and saree clad ladies, young and old
they smile they cheer with subtlety, but that’s how they roll

Whatever its motive that time may have been
For me it is clear from what I have seen
it gives us hope that we can do a lot
Nothing is impossible if we have a mission to be sought

From Aryabhatta to MOM, we have come a long way
ISRO’s eyes are set on targets with no chance of sway
it enlightens the hope to overcome and explore
it keeps successes quiet and let its work to do the roar.

Made this small gesture with ideas from Newspace India and Sandy.

ISROCKS

ISRO’s Mars orbiter mission, Chandrayaan and Aryabhatta satellites

Well, I just wish to see more of their work to be displayed in schools and colleges, more exhibitions of the achievements, occasional site visits of the launches of the PSLVs, more boastful tweets like Elon Musk does, but I know that won’t happen. They will keep building amazing stuffs with seriousness and calm. But I am sure that they will continue to inspire and give smiles to us.

 

 

Update: Came across this interesting video:

Axe and Tree

There was once a confident but a fruitless tree
it kept swaying lightly, often with glee
Leaves were scanty and shade was small
Still it could give relief to one and all
Filtered the sunlight and made Sun more soothing
Travelers could take shelter and indulge in snoozing
Branches were short but when it rained
you could wait there, it didn’t much pain.

Tree wasn’t exceptional as it did what all others did too
It’s the basic job of the tree to see everyone through
It started boasting occasionally and carry an ego of its own
Trees around liked it anyways, for it, they had themselves sown
The ego however was growing more like a balloon
It had started to believe that it deserved much more swoon
But they wanted the tree to be more useful in another way
They wanted it to be eventually furniture-d away.

It’s the fate of the tree to be used for making a table
If you can’t give flowers, be a chair, it’s in the fable
But it had now become selfish and also quite stubborn
And acted like it could lead life on its own terms
Although, it was aware of its size and visible shortcomings
It still acted casual and was conscious of the jeers forthcoming
With time, gleaming leaves started falling, it started to concur
Other trees started showed anger, it’s time, stop being a wanker.

This poem is not at all related to the Biblical Luke 13:6
which talks of a non-fruitful tree which had gotten into Jesus’ fix
Destined it is though, that the tree had to eventually give in
It said you can cut one one branch at a time and let it sink in
They agreed and called a Lumberjack to do the due
Tree didn’t know of how much pain the Axe will spew
So an axe falls, other trees rejoice and a branch dismembers
Time goes on, we live and die, the axe forgets but the tree remembers…

Well in Time Day Post

If you are ‘taken’ and reading this from your safe confine
Had a romantic candle lit night dine and topped it with wine so fine
Have just gifted her ring which has luster so bright, it shines
then buddy I think that you did the right thing, well in time.

Because if you have delayed it and still waiting for the right moment
you are surely outdone yourself, get prepared for some relentless torment
You’re going to get hounded like MSM media yells at Modi government
You will run high and dry and won’t get a breather, forget about chlormint.

Your friends your neighbors your cook your tailor
Your aunt your uncle your didi her Devar
Your teacher your peon your relatives ask you a favor
and your colleagues your dhobhi your barber and his shaver
and many more ask directly without being any clever
that when are you getting married, do it no, be braver
it is nothing, lose some slack, don’t be a saver
see this, meet her, say hi, arey at least crave her
you don’t have time left now, we will give you no waiver.

Look at them, they got married in a grand style last year
Uploaded 158 pics of the wedding, 200 pics of honeymoon, don’t jeer
Mostly blurry but rest were clear, taken from a distance and very near
they are happy so what if they have bloated and enhanced their rear
well we will be your seer and prophecise for you my dear
you have wasted so much time, stop lazying around change your gear
if you don’t you will rot soon, is our fear
what is this, why have you grown a beard
Y U NO understand, dress up nicely, wear this wear

Come let us go and meet this family
they are not that affluent but the girl is very pretty
Pretty she might be, but she is not of my affinity
What are you saying, what’s wrong with her, are you being witty?
Man, you’re aging now and reaching the escape velocity
remember, once you turn the draconian age of 30
you will get no one far and bloody no one in any city
OK, see another, she is not that nice, but family has never seen scarcity
NO? You are such a dumbass, soon you will have no pity
You have gone mad and you ought to be left alone away from this vicinity
OK, see another, she is so cool, it seems she has everything in her kitty
NO?, what an idiot you are, why do go into nitty-gritty?

Sigh, been driving down this road and now cannot take this load
Judging someone just in a meeting, makes me look like a tadpole toad
Will settle down some day eventually, why are you getting bored
I am trying you know, cannot like someone you showed
just like that, don’t have that switch mode
it is not some code which you can write and gloat
I am trying you know, working on it from tip to node
BharatMatrimonyJeevanSaathiShaadiSimpleMarry I tried but then tip-toed
That is again liking someone just by pictures you showed
I know the clock is ticking, but it is okay, I blowed,
It will happen or not happen, who cares, this is just an ode,
to my brain which is soon, about to explode.

Tick tock tick tock tick…
BOOOM!

Please Like my Baby

Please like my baby for my baby is so cute,
Look at its* cho-chweet cheeks, and at its tiny snoot…
How cuddly it is, so plump and fluffy, don’t you think so?
So adorable no? The eyes, don’t you think they glow?
The sound it makes, gagagogo gulp, isn’t that music to your ear,
It might be difficult to decipher for you, should I translate to make it clear?

Hey like my baby alright, don’t like it more than necessary…
Although, I’ve applied kala tika protection but I’m wary to keep evils at bay,
No no, don’t ever dare to make that annoyed face, for my baby is a dude,
Doesn’t matter if it wets your lap, don’t complain, no, it’s rude…
How dare you showed discomfort on the running nose of my baby…
Even if it drools more than its weight, why are you going so crazy,

Are you jealous that it is my baby and yours are going down the drain,
You have to like mine on all social media even if it inflicts any pain…
Yes, you are a nobody, what you know you dumbo, still I need your approval,
I’m going to send my baby to this baby beauty contest, if I don’t someone else will…
Do you realize how important is it, to get these social media validations…
Baby will need them in school admission and other important certifications,

I’ve changed my DP to my baby’s pics to show my honesty and intimacy…
Why should I fear, when it grows old, it will take care of its own privacy,
So praise it now and then, please like my baby for my baby is so cute,
It’s an opportunity for you to prove your friendliness, O’ my friend so astute,
Do like the pic where the baby is asleep with father/mother, that’s the pic with the juice…
Yes, do the job you have been asked to do as baby is the best thing we could (re)produce.

(* Using its because we don’t differentiate between boy and girl child on this blog)

P.S.: I thought I am going to offend many people with this post but nobody is going to read this anyway so I am safe. I hope.

Maidaan

पास के क्रिकेट के मैदान में अब घास नहीं उगती,
हर कहीं पैर पड़ने की वजह से अब ज़मीन बंजर हो चली है |
खेल तो अब भी खेले जाते हैं, पास दूर से बहुत बच्चे रोज़ आते हैं,
दिन भर चिल्ल-पों मचता ही रहता है, मैदान यह सब चुपचाप सहता है |

बाउंड्री पर अब झाड़ भी सूख चूका है,
कोना कोना मटमैला रूख चूका है |
गेंद जब सरक कर कोने की दीवार पर आके टकराती है,
कराह उठता है वो मैदान जैसे कोई सुई चुभो दी हो |

नाराज़ तो होता है लेकिन बच्चो की ख़ुशी देख कर लौटा देता है गेंद,
उसे तो इंतज़ार रहता है कि अँधेरा हो और बच्चे घर लौट जाएँ |
शाम ढलते ही बाउंड्री के बाहर वाले पेड़ो पर पक्षी लौट आते हैं,
सुरीली से करतल ध्वनि उस मैदान को गाके सुनाते हैं |

उन्ही पेड़ों से रोड-लाइट की रौशनी जब छन के आती है मैदान पर,
कोई नहीं होता क्रिकेट खेलने वाला, असली तब आता है मज़ा उस मैदान को |
पक्षी भी सोचुके होते हैं तब तक, अलग सा सन्नाटा छा जाता है,
बाउंड्री की दीवारें तत्पर रहती है अँधेरे के लिए, मन ही मन मुस्कुराती हुई |

थोडा और अँधेरा ढलने पर, दीवारों पर फूल खिल उठते हैं,
थोड़े थोड़े अंतराल पर, जहां जहां रोशनी नहीं होती |
चहचहाते हैं फूल, अठखेलियाँ करते हैं,
मैदान खुश हो उठता है, पेड़ो से रौशनी और कम कर देता है |

जब तक फूल आपस में व्यस्त रहते हैं, निहारता रहता है सुनसान मैदान उन्हें,
दिन भर जो बंजर रहा, जैसे अँधेरा होते हैं वसंत ऋतू आ गई हो |
जो दिन भर हुल्लड़ बाजी और शोर शराबा होता रहा,
अँधेरे में वहीँ वायलिन और सैक्सोफोन बजने लगते हैं |

जब कोई गुज़रता है मैदान के बाहर से, कोशिश करता है मैदान के फूल disturb न हो,
गुजरने वाले को जिज्ञासा भी होती हो, तो होने दो, मैदान तो फूला नहीं समाता |
थोड़ा सा कभी बाहर वाला भी मुस्कुरा देता है फूलों को देख कर,
मैदान को आँख मार कर इशारा कर देता है, कि लगे रहो, अपने को क्या |

कुछ तुनकमिजाज़ियों को फूल पसंद नहीं, खांस कर वो जता देते हैं,
फूल भी समझ जाते हैं, कि अँधेरा काफी हो चला है |
उलझी हुई अपनी डालियों को सुलझा के बिछड़ जाते हैं,
मिलेंगे फिर यहीं, इसी वक़्त कह के एक बार फिर से बंजर कर जाते हैं मैदान |

Maidaan

Maidaan