Please Like my Baby

Please like my baby for my baby is so cute,
Look at its* cho-chweet cheeks, and at its tiny snoot…
How cuddly it is, so plump and fluffy, don’t you think so?
So adorable no? The eyes, don’t you think they glow?
The sound it makes, gagagogo gulp, isn’t that music to your ear,
It might be difficult to decipher for you, should I translate to make it clear?

Hey like my baby alright, don’t like it more than necessary…
Although, I’ve applied kala tika protection but I’m wary to keep evils at bay,
No no, don’t ever dare to make that annoyed face, for my baby is a dude,
Doesn’t matter if it wets your lap, don’t complain, no, it’s rude…
How dare you showed discomfort on the running nose of my baby…
Even if it drools more than its weight, why are you going so crazy,

Are you jealous that it is my baby and yours are going down the drain,
You have to like mine on all social media even if it inflicts any pain…
Yes, you are a nobody, what you know you dumbo, still I need your approval,
I’m going to send my baby to this baby beauty contest, if I don’t someone else will…
Do you realize how important is it, to get these social media validations…
Baby will need them in school admission and other important certifications,

I’ve changed my DP to my baby’s pics to show my honesty and intimacy…
Why should I fear, when it grows old, it will take care of its own privacy,
So praise it now and then, please like my baby for my baby is so cute,
It’s an opportunity for you to prove your friendliness, O’ my friend so astute,
Do like the pic where the baby is asleep with father/mother, that’s the pic with the juice…
Yes, do the job you have been asked to do as baby is the best thing we could (re)produce.

(* Using its because we don’t differentiate between boy and girl child on this blog)

P.S.: I thought I am going to offend many people with this post but nobody is going to read this anyway so I am safe. I hope.

No Comments

Lora December 1, 2014 Reply

U need to make a snapchat.

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