Writing Experiment Lab

Open Letters for Open Letters

Hello Open Letter Writers!

How are you? I am in pink of my health here and hope the same for you.
This is my first open letter. Not that I don’t know how to write letters but I was bit conservative to write an open letter. I didn’t bother to write one anyways because Letters are meant to be private as I was taught. So,  please expect some deviations from the standard of Open Letter Writing. By the way is there any RFC for that? Any Guidelines? Protocol (From bottom to Up: PDNTSPA)? ISO standard? No? Tch. Okay, so here it goes.
People, why are you so frustrated? I mean are you the Indian Hockey Team? Or Rakhi Sawant’s father’s barber? Abhishek Manu Singhvi’s kids? Poonam Pandey’s true fan?
Why have you written so much text for someone who doesn’t even know you and, for sure, will never know you or read your open letter and Laugh Out Loud, unless you are Kamaal R Khan’s lookalike. Man, everyone knows that you did to get some cheap publicity. No, no, don’t look sideways or make faces. Everyone knew since beginning that you had penchant for being famous like our Mayawati had for expensive Kolapuri Chappals. See, I know that few people  became famous writing open letters, but not everyone is a tall sardar with a fancy surname no?
See, if you were frustrated over something, write over it in normal blog post kind of manner, outrage over it on Twitter, and move on with life. Writing open letters again and again, shows that you didn’t have courage to directly ask the subject. If frustration level had gone over the danger mark, like it happens during monsoon in our local naalaah (Drainage and Sewage System, c’mon, today is Hindi Diwas for God’s sake!) or Yamuna in your Delhi, you could have gone for a Hunger Strike at Ram Leela. Writing only, how will it help Sir?
Writing too many open letters will make you an open letter box. How shameful is that if you know what I mean? What will you write when you will run of the things which frustrate you? Now, you will say that there are innumerable things which frustrate you so you can go on and on and on. Abey, how frustrated can you be? Jaago Graahak Jaago but there should be a limit where you should get satisfied. Are you Hari Sadu’s Appraisal Reviewer or what?
Now the question is am I frustrated of you? Of course I am. Even after writing this, I am not going to get the number of comments I deserve. Huh.
Give my regards to your parents and your pet dog.
Your’s electronically
Irom Sharmila’s Level Ignored Blogger.